Guilt is an emotion most of us feel all the time – myself included. In fact, I feel guilty right now as I write this, because I know there are a million other things I should/could be doing. Exercising, mediating, getting back to people on whatsapp/facebook/email, tidying the house, decorating the house, reading my book about parenting, reading my book about health, scratching my balls…you get the point.
Is this self-torture really necessary? Is it pushing us to be better versions of ourselves? Or is it weighting us down, slowly chipping away at our self-esteem and self-worth?
I don’t have the answers. One thing I do know is that feeling guilty, and beating myself for not living up to the unrealistic expectations I often set for of myself does not feel good, and I could benefit from going a little easier on myself. Ahh damn…now I feel guilty for feeling guilty! 😉
Anyway…here’s a poem I’ve written about it. I’m no poet btw, but I’m pretty sure you just pick words that rhyme and put them in sentences, so thought I’d have a bash.
Guilty companion
Wake up! Its me your guilty companion
When you sleep it feels like I’ve dropped in a canyon
For eight whole hours, you’ve done nothing wrong
Oh wait, in-fact, you slept too long
Now get on with the day, there’s lots to do
I’d make the bed first, if I were you
But don’t take too long, you need a shower
Get ready, have breakfast, within the hour
Did you text back your friend? Clean your hair out the bath?
Unload the dishwasher? You’re having laugh!?
Whatever your doing, please don’t forget
That you must feel guilt, and constant regret
But who decided it must be this way?
That I beat myself up day-after-day?
Before I answer your question, you must be warned
That what I tell you next cannot be ignored
The cold, heartless voice that woke you in bed
Lives right here, inside of your head.
F$@k you guilt!
Comment below if you can relate, love to hear your toughts.
Cheers,
Dan
Omg ! Can so relate to this !
Beating myself up in my head all the time , love the poem Dan x
Hopefully it helps to know that you’re not the only one Loz 🙂
This is mint. Although I felt guilty the whole time. Got other stuff to be doing, you know… Not only does it mess up your self-esteem but I also think it kills your productivity and stops you from giving any one task your full attention/enjoyment. I probably stopped reading this about three or four times to think about other stuff I should be doing. I don’t have answers either but I think keeping to-do lists and planning your day can help! Harder when you have kids though, I’m sure.
Yes mate! Guilt is just another of the many distractions we have taking us out of the present moment. I think phones, and the million things they give us access too, are also a massive drain on productivity. I often turn off notifications, or even put it on airplane mode if I want to get stuff done.
Naval Ravikant refers to them as dopamine snacks in this podact – https://tim.blog/2015/08/18/the-evolutionary-angel-naval-ravikant/ – love him!
I’ve experienced paralysis due to combined feelings of both guilt and fear of missing out, ending up doing neither what I want or what I ‘should’.
Should is a strange word though. If we strip back all of the layers of definition, there’s no ‘should’ about anything.
Maybe to feel more centered, rather than pulled this way and that, we could try to align what we should do and what we want to do into the same activity as much as possible.